Love Shouldn't Be...

So here we are – at the end of our long journey. I think destiny finally found its way towards us. 

Our last conversation is the most difficult and the easiest I have ever had. 

In a relationship as long and difficult as we have had, the decision to end it this way makes me happy for the way we finally decided to do it. Not only were we finally able to talk to each other respectfully, we have managed to do so with the hope of actually being friends in the future. 

This is by far the most important chapter in my life. This is the most personal and the deepest relationship I have been in, romantically or otherwise. The memories are so strong that it has the power to wound. It does wound me still... sometimes. 

This is a difficult time for me but I promise to do all in my power to help you pursue the happiness you have been looking for. I am here, always have been and will always be for you whenever you want me to. 

How, what and why the painful part of our relationship happened doesn’t matter anymore. Those aren’t enough and will never be enough to erase the beautiful parts. I will love you, unconditionally always. I am proud of what we shared, I am proud of being your ex-girlfriend and believe me when I say, no association has ever meant so much to me than that. 

It's natural, tonight, to feel some disappointment but tomorrow, I know I will move beyond it. 

We fought as hard as we could. And though we fell short, it was I who failed, not you. 

I am so deeply grateful to you for all you have done for me. I wish the outcome had been different but it doesn’t mean I wouldn’t do it all over again. 

I have always been a fortunate girl and never more so for what you have given me and made me experience. All I can offer is my love and gratitude and the promise of being a better friend in the years ahead. 

I don't know what more we could have done to try to make this work. I'll leave that to history to determine. Every person makes mistakes, and I'm sure I made my share of them. But I won't spend a moment of the future regretting what might have been.

This relationship was and will remain the great experience of my life, and my heart is filled with nothing but gratitude to those 12 months. I would not be a person worthy of this space should I regret a fate that has allowed me the extraordinary privilege of being a part of your life. That is blessing enough for me.

Tonight, more than any night, I hold in my heart nothing but love for you and for everything we’ve been through. I wish you well, the man whom i have loved the greatest. I know you will do this even if i don’t say but let me still say – JUST BELIEVE. Believe always in the promise of God to give you happiness, hope and a future.

Letter written back in 2010... this was never sent.

(Originally posted

K.G. Raymund

No comments:

Post a Comment